You shall not judge

I was once speaking with a friend who disagreed with me that everyone is called to simplicity. Though we were both reasonable people, the topic is inherently personal, and he felt that I was being judgmental.  He kept repeating “You’re judging me, you’re judging me!”

“Well, you’re judging me for judging you” I answered.

I thought I was pretty clever, but actually he struck at exactly the problem. I’ve often wondered why, given that simplicity is so clearly church teaching, more people don’t talk about it or teach it!

Is it because my friends and family and colleagues will all feel judged? I’m self conscious inviting people into my home because our couch is ratty and carpets ‘need’ replacing. Maybe in the same way that I’m afraid people will judge me for my simple standard of living, maybe they are afraid that I will judge them for their granite counter tops or large television.

I hope that I am humble enough that I will not judge my friends for their lifestyles. But at the same time, I do not believe that I ought to deny that luxury is a vice.  Suppose a man looked at porn. I would not judge him for what he did in a moment of weakness. But if he sought to argue that it was not weakness, that lust was not a vice contrary to charity and our God given dignity-  well, then I would feel duty bound to speak the truth.

The challenge is, how to do I teach the truth-  that luxury is a vice and contrary to church teaching- without implicating someones lifestyle choice?  In a lot of ways I feel like one of the reluctant prophets-  I have this message that I am persuaded is from God, but I don't want to speak it because of my own fear of rejection.

I believe the decision to live simply is deeply personal, and is a matter of conscience.  Not that someone with a well informed conscience might think they shouldn't make sacrifices to give to the poor.  But the degree is a matter of conscience.  How much should I give? How big should my house be? Where can I go on vacation? Do I put my kid in hockey?  Do I pay for my kid to go to better schools? How much money can I spend on pets?

There are a myriad of questions we must answer. The church does not provide clear guidelines, and neither will I. I have to continue discerning my own choices, and I know I can be wiser and more generous. So who am I to judge?

The key is to remember that ”purchasing is always a moral- and not simply economic - act“ (Benedict XVI)

When deciding how God would have us live, let us follow our informed consciences, make love our aim, and approach others doing the same thing with humility.